Breathing under water

“…I’ve got no problem breathing under water” by Diana Maus

So… This thing happened the other day. A worse thing happened today. Something went wrong last week and it still bothers me. One really grating thing can’t be spoken of because someone might read it. And last night, something was said that made me uncomfortable and many unsaid things did too. Then, this and that happened, here and there, with so and so, and I finally went to sleep last night feeling disconnected, my feelings drowned in every undisclosed thing.

8 thoughts on “Breathing under water

  1. This must be going around. This & that happened to me also. & his & that was or wasn’t said & I feel terrible. No sleep, carrying on with my self & just not liking any of it. Well, obviously we have things to work out & in the working out of it, revelation (maybe too strong?) Will take place. Or an ahh haa moment or just some acceptance about the whole thing.

  2. Sorry if you’ve got it too.

    Hmm, I miss girlfriends like I had when I was young. I miss being able to bitch about things. A blog is too public. A best friend is the way to go, don’t you think?

  3. I lost my best friend last month. She passed away the day after my mother did. I miss both of them so much but my best friend-well she was that person that I could totally be myself with & she still loved me & didn’t judge me. & I was the same for her. Yeah, I know what you mean.

  4. @donita I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Your mother and best friend – unbelievable loss.
    So sorry.

    The person I share everything with is ill and unavailable for now and it has been hard, both worrying about her and missing her. And, not that it’s the same thing at all, but I recently heard that my very close girlfriend from high school died recently and I felt the loss as if we had been that close just yesterday.

    My deepest sympathies to you.

  5. Diana,
    So sorry about the thing and the other thing. I understand that you don’t feel that you can go into detail in your blog.

    I miss having a best friend on a daily basis. I haven’t had that in several years, and I really, really miss it. I mean, Corey is great, but he’s still a guy. The whole female best friend, real friend is so great when you have it that not having it leaves this big gaping whole that no one else can seem to fill.

    Sorry, did I just run off about myself and forget to comment on your subject?

    Back to you: I am sincerely sorry to hear about your bf from high school. I am fortunate enough that my bf from high school actually reads my blog and comments from time to time.

    I hope your days get better. You can e-mail me whenever you like.
    Lita

  6. @poietes No, you aren’t running off about yourself, you are describing my experience exactly – the big whole nothing else can fill. I don’t know how to remedy it at my age and where I am right now. I’m glad you still have contact with your BF from HS.

  7. Interesting but mostly frustrating because it seems my things and your things are defined differently. However much more amusing if I pick nouns describing the things currently in my life and insert them into your paragraph. And somewhat eerily portentous.

  8. @westwood Is it frustrating because I don’t identify the issues? I wrote this because it is frustrating to me not to be able to talk about the most important relationships in my life due to privacy concerns.

    Also, the statement seems to sum up what life is like for most of us… frustrating!

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